A Dad of His Own Read online

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  It was dark and cold when they arrived at the church for the carol service just before five. The church dated back to Norman times. It was compact with no bell tower, just a small bell cote. There were carvings of primitive people on the doorposts and, to Freddie’s delight, strange dragons and beasts carved on the back of some of the pews. The inside was decorated with evergreens, oranges and red berries glowing in the soft candlelight.

  The vicar, who seemed almost as old as the church itself, had a strong and powerful voice and urged them to pray and to help each other following the flood.

  Anna glanced round at the congregation. Lucy and Mattie, dressed warmly in thick coats, hats and scarves, waved at her. She felt that some of the other locals were inspecting her and Freddie.

  The first carol, ‘O Little Town of Bethlehem’, started, and Anna thought of her family and Gary, as yet another Christmas came and went without him.

  A moment later someone squeezed in beside her; it was Simon. ‘Sorry,’ he whispered, ‘only just made it.’

  They shared a hymn sheet and across the aisle she saw Cathie watching them, and if looks could kill she’d be dead already.

  Twelve

  When the service was over Freddie said excitedly to Simon, ‘I hope Father Christmas knows I’m here. I’ve got my stocking ready, it’s a very long one, my dad used to wear it for skiing.’

  ‘Oh… that’s nice.’ Simon threw Anna a glance and, afraid he’d question Freddie about Gary’s whereabouts, she said quickly,

  ‘Of course Father Christmas knows you’re here, you wrote him a letter before we left home to tell him.’

  Cathie appeared beside them, gazing up at Simon and ignoring her and Freddie. ‘I kept you a place, Simon, you said you’d be late,’ she grumbled at him.

  ‘Thanks, I slipped in here beside Anna and Freddie,’ he said. ‘It was a lovely service, feel it might be Christmas after all despite that terrible flood leaving people homeless.’

  Although Cathie seemed to do her best to round up Simon, as if he needed herding, he made sure that Anna and Freddie had a drink and joined in with everyone in the church hall.

  Anna looked round the hall, gone were the sad collection of homeless people and their belongings and instead the room was decked in shiny decorations looped across the ceiling. There was a rich aroma of mulled wine and the sound of cheerful chatter as people greeted each other, commiserated on the disaster that had befallen the village and seemed determined to enjoy themselves.

  Freddie sped off with Benny and joined a group of other hyper children. Luke came up and joined Anna, Simon and Cathie, and then Mattie appeared, in yet another hat – a small, dark green velvet affair perched on the side of her head.

  ‘It’s my cocktail hat,’ she explained to Anna. ‘People wore them in the evenings before the war. I always wear it to parties.’

  ‘Very becoming,’ Simon said. ‘I hope you’re bearing up, Mattie, it’s been a terrible ordeal for you… for everyone whose houses were hit.’

  ‘I’m so relieved,’ Mattie looked round at them all, ‘that my insurance seems to be going to cover most of the damage to my cottage. I can have nice new curtains and everything.’ She beamed, excited as a child.

  ‘That’s great news,’ Anna said, ‘you’ll have such fun choosing.’

  ‘So what did the insurance people say about the people sleeping in the castle?’ Mattie asked Simon. ‘I missed that bit, as I was seeing to my cottage.’

  The room was buzzing with noise and Anna leant forward to hear his answer. Cathie wedged herself neatly between Anna and Simon as if guarding him.

  ‘If they stay away from the main rooms and some of the castle staff…’

  ‘Namely you and I,’ Luke interrupted laughing.

  ‘Yes, I suppose us, unless someone else volunteers, sleep near those rooms, the insurance will accept it for a few days. After all, there’s only six people and they can stay there until after Boxing Day,’ Simon said.

  Cathie, who’d been listening in silence, now protested. ‘That’s a bit much, Simon. Wouldn’t you want to be in your own bed over Christmas?’ She eyed him longingly, but he didn’t seem to notice.

  Anna wondered if Cathie wished that she were in Simon’s bed over Christmas.

  ‘Can’t be helped,’ Simon said, ‘it’s worth it to make sure people like Mattie who have nowhere else to go are able to be somewhere comfortable and familiar. Anyway, I’ve never slept in a castle before and it was quite exciting. My room is enormous compared to my one at home and there’s some lovely bits of furniture in it. I sort of wondered if I’d hear a ghost, strange footsteps,’ he laughed.

  Luke said, ‘Don’t say things like that, there aren’t any ghosts are there?’

  ‘No, and if there are, they’re quite harmless, just shadows of people who lived there before,’ Mattie said kindly. ‘Thank you for being there, the two of you, it’s very comforting.’

  Nell and Tessa, the sisters who ran the admin side of everything at the castle, had returned from their break in the country and came up to them in the crowded hall and Simon introduced them to Anna.

  They were middle-aged; Tessa rather glamorous with long blonde hair tied back in a velvet ribbon and full make-up. Nell had greying hair and a scrubbed-clean face.

  ‘Baptism of fire for you then, Anna,’ Nell said with a smile. ‘I was shocked when I heard about the flood.’

  ‘We never thought such a disaster would happen,’ Tessa said. ‘The river is usually calm, almost lazy. But you all dealt with it as best you could, I gather?’

  ‘Well, I don’t know about that, but Simon and Luke coped wonderfully,’ Anna said warmly.

  ‘Thanks, we did our best,’ Simon smiled at her, ‘though it’s tragic for the people in the village with their cottages and shops ruined.’

  ‘I hope they all get compensation,’ Anna said.

  ‘I think everyone in the village has their own insurance, so I do hope so,’ Nell said. ‘Can’t believe we missed it, the first time the village has flooded in living memory.’

  ‘Don’t make it sound as if you missed the party of the year,’ Tessa said sharply to her sister. ‘It must have been terrifying, all that water rushing into people’s houses in the middle of the night.’

  ‘Of course, I didn’t mean it like that,’ Nell retorted, and Anna had the feeling that the sisters quite enjoyed quarrelling with one another.

  ‘I love your hat, Mattie, it’s so pretty,’ Lucy came over and joined the small gathering. ‘You’ve got a good collection, one for every occasion.’

  ‘A lot have sadly perished over the years, got at by the moths, try as I might to protect them, but at least they are safe from the flood.’ She sighed, ‘I’m afraid it’s going to take a long time to get everything back to normal again though.’

  ‘Where will you go until then?’ Anna was worried for her.

  ‘Well,’ Mattie’s eyes shone, ‘an old flame of mine who lives in Spain has suggested I go and stay with him for the rest of the winter. We are both on our own and it would be lovely to be in the sun together.’ She laughed, and for a moment Anna glimpsed the young, beautiful woman she must have been.

  ‘That sounds perfect, and hopefully you’ll come back to a restored cottage.’

  ‘I’ve got good neighbours who’ll look after it, we’re a tight band here, and do our best to look out for each other.’ Mattie drained her glass and accepted a top-up from a young person doing the rounds with the mulled wine.

  Seeing Colin collecting up the children, Lucy said that it was time to go back to supper, so the boys would not be too late for bed. They made their farewells and Anna and Freddie went back with Lucy and her family.

  Anna had brought some of her candied nuts in pretty bags as presents and after supper Lucy hung them on the tree ‘to enjoy after Christmas when all they needed cheering up’.

  Lucy’s parents, Peter and Gilly, who had arrived that day, were genial and cheerful like her own
and Anna warmed to them at once. The two girls, Josie and Fleur, entertained them with descriptions of the parties they were going to and Benny and Freddie sat together whispering about Father Christmas, and should they set a trap for him?

  ‘He’ll never come again then,’ Fleur said, making Freddie say, ‘We wouldn’t hurt him, but I’d like to see him.’

  ‘Fat chance of that,’ Josie said, ‘you have to be awfully good to see him.’

  ‘Bet you haven’t seen him then,’ Benny said, and Freddie giggled.

  ‘You can all pull one cracker and then it’s bed for you, Benny,’ Lucy said, and there was a scrabble to snatch a cracker from the arrangement of silver and gold ones on the table before they were all pulled with much laughter. The boys grabbing the contents of rubber balls, metal puzzles, bottle openers and other things as they fell to the floor.

  ‘It’s been lovely, thank you,’ Anna nudged Freddie for him to remember his manners and thank everyone for such a wonderful evening, which he duly did, he and Benny vigorously shaking hands with each other, laughing, before Anna told him to calm down and they went out into the dark, cold night.

  They were back in the castle by eight thirty replete and content after their evening with Lucy and her family.

  Freddie got ready for bed, excitedly putting his empty stocking and a sock for Ozzie on the end of his bed and leaving a plate of biscuits for Father Christmas in the living room by the fireplace and some carrots for the reindeer.

  ‘Don’t light the fire, will you, in case Father Christmas burns himself,’ he said anxiously.

  ‘No, of course not. Hurry to bed and I’ll read you a quick story,’ she said, chasing him into his bedroom. Anna tucked him in. ‘Have you had a lovely day?’ she said. ‘We’ve met such nice people here, haven’t we?’

  ‘Benny’s my best friend. It might be good to live here,’ he said sleepily.

  Anna did not reply but opened his book, a story of a boy and his adventures on a horse, and began to read to him.

  He was surprisingly quiet; he didn’t seem to be as interested in the story as he usually was. No doubt he was tired, as well as excited for Christmas Day. She read to the end of the page before closing the book.

  ‘Mum, it’s Christmas tomorrow and we haven’t found me a dad yet, have we?’ He regarded her hopefully as if perhaps there was one wrapped up for him under the tree.

  She held him close to her, blinking back tears, if only – what pointless words they were. Oh how she wished Gary were here. He loved excitement and lived life to the full, but he had lost his life too soon, and such a random accident, crashing in a taxi on a stag do. She could feel him close to her now, tall and athletic, poised on the rocks over a turquoise sea ready to dive in, or joshing with his mates, or tearing round a football pitch. He always seemed to be in a hurry; had he somehow sensed his life would be cut off too soon?

  ‘Not yet, no, Freddie, but a good dad is very difficult to find, so it might take longer than we think. We want to be sure he’s the right person.’ She stroked his back, at least they had each other, but she sensed now, as he was growing up, that she was not enough for him, but it would take a very special person to be a father to him and perhaps impossible to find.

  Thirteen

  Freddie was up early on Christmas morning. Anna was woken by his cries of delight as he found his bulging stocking on the end of his bed.

  He appeared in her room with a huge smile, and the bulky stocking clasped to him.

  ‘He’s been,’ he said, ‘Father Christmas has been.’ He climbed onto her bed and began to open the small presents with excitement, tearing off the paper to reveal toys and sweets and a tangerine in the toe. He lay back at last. ‘My best stocking ever,’ he exclaimed happily.

  ‘We’d better have breakfast, remember we have lunch in the castle later and we must telephone Granny and Grandpa and Uncle Robert,’ Anna said. ‘We’ll leave our other presents until we get back, shall we? Something to look forward to.’

  ‘OK,’ Freddie said a little reluctantly, though he soon became engrossed in the toys in his stocking.

  Ringing her family made Anna feel a little homesick. She imagined them all round the breakfast table, her parents having little to eat to leave space for the enormous Christmas meal they’d have, cooked mostly by Robert, who was a brilliant ‘special occasion’ cook. Freddie spoke to him at length about the castle and the people they’d met, but to Anna’s relief he did not mention not finding a dad among his presents.

  After they’d rung off, Freddie gave Ozzie his presents, a chewy stick and a red ball to roll around his cage, and then it was time to get dressed and head off to the castle for lunch.

  The lunch was taking place in what used to be the servants’ hall in the depths of the castle. The flood had wrecked the downstairs rooms in the Partridge, but fortunately the water had not touched the food, so Victor and Jade had moved it all into the castle.

  Freddie was excited to go inside the main part of the castle and see the suits of armour in the hall.

  ‘And those swords,’ he pointed to some enclosed in a glass case high up on the wall. ‘Are they still used sometimes?’

  ‘I shouldn’t think so, health and safety would surely have strict rules about them,’ Anna said, ‘but look at those lifelike birds, aren’t they beautiful?’

  ‘It’s far too big for a real bird,’ he said.

  Other people were coming in now and going into the gloom of the passage in front of them.

  ‘It’s a bit dark here,’ Freddie said, moving closer to her as they followed the others down the passage.

  ‘I know. The people, cooks, cleaners, gardeners and such, lived in these shadowy and dismal rooms below ground when there were lots of people to help run the place long ago,’ Anna explained. ‘The rich people lived upstairs in beautiful rooms filled with priceless furniture, pictures, silk curtains and all sorts of wonderful treasures.’

  ‘I’d have liked to be a rich person,’ Freddie said, taking her hand, a little scared by the long shadowy passage that lay ahead, the lights seeming to hide as well as reveal the dark alcoves cut into the walls. ‘Who does all the work now?’ Freddie asked when they reached the room where they were to eat.

  The room was full of chattering people, polished and shining in their smart clothes. It was a large space with a low ceiling next to a vast kitchen and sculleries and various other rooms that made up the ‘servants quarters’ in the past. It had been prettily decorated with evergreens and red and gold shiny balls, and the long table laid with a red cloth and some piles of gold crackers. There was a small Christmas tree blinking coloured lights at them in the corner.

  Everyone was already in merry mood, and Anna felt shy as she watched on, wishing that Lucy and Colin were here.

  ‘It’s all different now, Freddie,’ Anna said to him as they stood together just inside the door. ‘Now machines do a lot of the work, and you can buy good ready-made food to cook and the fabrics of clothes are much easier to keep clean.’ She felt she was talking just to combat her feeling of not fitting in here with these people who all knew each other so well.

  Julius, who had just come in, overheard their conversation and, smiling at Freddie, said, ‘Hello, I’m Julius, I think you were asleep when I called round the other evening, and this is Felix, he seems to like you.’

  Felix came up to greet him and Freddie stroked him, saying wistfully, ‘I wish we had a dog, but I have a guinea pig called Ozzie.’

  ‘Did he come with you?’ Julius asked.

  ‘Yes, you can meet him if you like.’

  ‘I look forward to it,’ Julius said. ‘Now, let me introduce you; ah, there’s Mattie and this is Jenny, who organises all the wedding breakfasts and such in the castle.’ He put his hand on the arm of a tall, dark-haired woman dressed in a jade green silk shirt and black trousers. ‘Anna and Freddie,’ he said, before excusing himself and turning to speak to someone behind him who was trying to get his attention.

 
; ‘Ah, the wonderful people who’ve stepped in at the last moment so Sidney and Philly could get away,’ Jenny said. ‘I do hope you’re happy here despite the flood.’

  ‘Yes, it’s a great place.’ Anna wondered if she and Julius were an item.

  Victor and Jade bustled around, handing out drinks and canapés before darting back to the kitchen to check on the cooking. Victor was small and thin and Jade warm and cuddly and the two of them along with some other staff, who worked at the Partridge, produced the traditional lunch: turkey and all the trimmings, Christmas pudding and a huge Stilton sitting on a board with a silver spoon to scoop it out.

  People began to search for their places and sit down. There were a couple of children who took Freddie to the other end of the table where they were sitting together, leaving Anna feeling bereft for a moment, though she scolded herself for her foolishness. There were place names on the long table and Anna saw with relief that she had been placed with Luke on one side of her and Nell on the other.

  Luke joined her as she sat down. ‘I’m starving, I didn’t have any breakfast,’ he announced, sitting beside her.

  Nell followed shortly after. ‘Such a shock about the floods, there hasn’t been such a bad one in living memory,’ she said. ‘And such bad luck for you and your boy expecting a lovely country Christmas.’

  ‘But we are warm and dry in the flat and it’s so much worse for all the people whose homes and businesses are ruined.’ Anna glanced across at Mattie who was sitting next to Everard, who she and Freddie had seen coming out of the castle on to the tilting ground.